I get so down on thinking 'is this all I do everyday - cook clean deal with tantrums give baths wipe bottoms and noses and clean some more'. This is every single day. There is no relief in this work. There is no clock in clock off - other then a few moments in the night you are not interrupted.

But then I remember somehow that I really wouldn't want anyone else to be doing this for my children but me. Even if it sends me over the edge. I try to fix the reasons for why i could be getting close to the edge everyday with  little tweeks here and there to perfect the flow of how things go.

Right now, we have had a serious answer to prayer come our way in the last little while. Our family has been longing to have daddy home more, home each night and with us on the weekend. We are so happy that our desire for our family has been granted and are soooo happy for it. He now is flying for a company monday to friday and home every night!! I can't believe this day has actually come.

Now i don't know if all my dreams are going to come true as I have longed for this day for many years now (7 years or so its been) so I am remembering that this is a gift that might only be a short season. Right now we have a new house new job and new pre school for little asher. Its a very exciting time. All new routines and playgroups to go to and outings to explore  I love the feeling that I get to make the house my own, there's no pressure to have to go to work outside the home for me so I can potter away and take my time. It really is a lovely time in life. I hope I will be able to teach our children well how we have waited for something which has now come and it is all from the gifts our Heavenly Father has blessed us with. I don't mean to sound flowery or strange but that is an honest feeling I have. These blessings have come from Him and I am happy and grateful to know that.

Gosh the news has been keeping me up at night worrying about so many different aspects of society right now. Violence and greed, drugs and deception. It makes me never want to turn the news on. It may seem naive but I am happy to keep my little family safe from harm and innocent for as long as I can. I love that I have the power to do that right now as when they get older its all from outside my control. I know that as I work hard now the lessons and training I give these little ones will be a blessing to them for their future decision making. As I hold their hand now and as they fully trust me to take good care of them I feel honoured for the priveledge  to do so.